


Grayscale

by Kahnah



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Blood, Dead by Daylight au, Gen, hell it's Halloween after all!, scary things, so you know the deal, some gore
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-31
Updated: 2016-11-09
Packaged: 2018-08-28 05:06:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 19,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8432908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kahnah/pseuds/Kahnah
Summary: Trying to escape a living nightmare, Ryan didn't think it could come any worse.That was until he stumbled over a little boy trapped alongside with him.Now he has to protect both of their lives.
Dead By Daylight AU





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Halloween, guys!
> 
> This started as a scene for Nowhere Kids and then started to derail so quickly that it became its own story!
> 
> Shout out to Riley for having the idea in the first place!
> 
>  
> 
> kahnah23:  
>  you know  
>  this idea started kinda cute  
>  and then it went downhill
> 
> majoringinsarcasm:  
>  That about sums us up
> 
> majoringinsarcasm:  
>  From cute to heartbreaking in five seconds or less
> 
> kahnah23:  
>  that shall be our motto

Grayscale

Chapter 1

 

Gavin was running.

He was running as fast and as far as his short legs could carry him. He didn’t know where he was running to or what exactly from, nor did he know what had happened.

He had been on the way home from school when some classmates had dared him to go through the forest. It was actually a shorter route, but his mom always told him not to go through the woods. There was a bad house where bad people had been.

It had a funny name, one he had already forgotten, but he hadn’t even seen it.

What had happened after he moved through the lines of trees, quaking in his shorts, but not daring to turn around because his friends would laugh at him and call him names, he didn’t know. 

It had been just after noon but now it was dark and he was cold. He had woken up by a campfire but there had been no one there. 

At least at first.

There had been a noise, like the cawing of a large bird and it had scared him half to death. Something white had flashed by in the corner of his eye and he had started to run.

He was running for quite a while now, his lungs burning and his sides hurting but that thing was still behind him. He could hear it, not because of crunching leaves or breaking sticks but that strange cawing noise, that sounded more and more like a scream, like laughter.

It had to be one of those bad people his mom had talked about and he didn’t know what they wanted from him but he just wanted to go home.

Home to his mom, into the warm house. He would even clean the dishes and do his homework!

Everything, if he could only find the way out of this forest.

At least it weren’t only trees anymore, it were gray, brittle walls. Ruins from something much bigger and in the distance there was some flickering lights.

Maybe he could find help there, maybe that’s where his mom was already waiting for him.

Not that he got that far.

He stumbled over a stone and skinned his knees as he fell to the ground. For a second he just sat there, listening to the cackling coming from behind and he started to cry.

It was too much,  everything _ ,  _ because he was scared and he didn’t know where he was and he just wanted  _ to go home! _

Arms wrapped around him and he couldn’t even scream before a hand pressed against his mouth. He tried to fight, he really did but he was small and tired and scared and they were just too strong as they pulled him into the bushes.

Tears ran hot over Gavin’s cheeks, over the hands shutting him up and he thought about every ghost story he had ever heard, over every child that ever went missing as his mind ran in circles.

What had he done wrong?

Why him? Had he done something bad, had he been a brat, cursed too much or not finished his plate?

He didn’t know, he just wanted to wake up in his room.

Sobbing, it came out muffled and a voice next to his ear tried to shush him down. If anything it only terrified him further and he tried to fight against the grasp but it was of no use.

He would die. Oh God, they would hurt him and kill him and he would die and never go back home.

Whoever held him went rigid behind him and now even squeezed his nose shut. It was terrifying, not being able to breath but then Gavin felt silent.

The cawing sound was right next to them and suddenly a lady appeared.

She was tall, clad in an uniform that maybe had been white before but now was covered in stains. Something was off, she looked a bit strange, and it took him a while to realize that she had a bag over her head and her head… her head was strangely crooked. Like she was trying to hear something right above her without looking at it.

Maybe that was what made his heart beat so fast. It nearly hurt and he could tell that whoever was behind him, had the same problem. He could feel their heartbeat against his left shoulder.

The lady looked around and did so with a certain grace that was off putting. He couldn’t quite tell why but not once did he think he should reach out, make a noise to bring her to look at him.

She wouldn’t help him, oh no.

She wasn’t here to help.

Then she vanished with the same high pitched scream as he had heard so many times by now. Like a ghost and now that he thought about that, he couldn’t help but stare at the place she had just left.

He was in a spooky story.

New tears found their way down his cheeks and he realized he still couldn’t breath. Struggling, he tore at the hand on his face and at least freed his nose.

“I’m gonna let you go,” a voice whispered in his ear. “But you gotta promise me to be really, really quiet. We don’t want her to come back.”

He nodded because he certainly didn’t want that and slowly, slowly that hand left his face. Instantly, he took a deep breath and turned around.

Behind him sat a man, finger in front of his mouth to gesticulate him to stay quiet. He looked dirty and tired and worn down but normal. Surely in need of a bath and some shaving, his light jacket ripped and covered in reddish brown stains but his eyes were full of concern.

That was probably what made Gavin calm down and wipe at his face.

They in silence stayed for a moment longer and Gavin made sure not to make a noise as long as the finger was still raised. The stranger was looking around, maybe waiting for something, but Gavin just kept his eyes on him, didn’t want to see any other horror anymore.

When the other finally spoke, it was with a heavy sigh, “Good God, what are you doing here, boy?”

“I got lost,” Gavin whispered and felt new tears sting his eyes. “I want to go home, sir.”

“I bet you do,” the other said. “God, I can’t believe… I never saw a child here. How… how old are you?”

“I’m ten years old, Sir. I’m in the fifth grade.” He wanted to sound proud because he was a big boy now but it just wouldn’t work. His voice shook apart and he felt like crying some more.

“I want to go home,” he repeated and rubbed at his eyes hard enough to see stars. Still he could feel the other’s gaze on him and sniffing, he looked up.

The stranger also seemed sad, worrying on his lip before shaking his head. “We have to move away from here for now, okay? Do you think you can follow me?”

“I’m not suppose to go away with strangers,” Gavin told him even though parting sounded really bad right now. “I just want to go home.”

“I know, but that’s not as easy as it sounds.” He extended his hand. “I’m Ryan. What’s your name?”

“I’m Gavin.” He didn’t take the other’s hand if only because his own was icky from tears and snot.

“Okay, so now we’re not strangers anymore, right?”

“That’s not how those things work.”

That made Ryan laugh quietly and it sounded rusty, like he hadn’t done that in a while. But his blue eyes lightened up with it and that made Gavin smile as well.

“You’re smart, Gavin. That’s absolutely true and I completely agree but I can’t leave you out here alone. We have to get somewhere that is at least a little safer.”

“Will this lady return?” he asked and felt his stomach drop when Ryan nodded.

“She will,” he said. “That’s the very first thing you have to learn, Gavin. She is everywhere at once and you have to make absolutely sure that she will never ever see you, okay?”

“What will happen if she sees me?” he whispered and if anything, he got even more scared when Ryan took a moment to consider his answer, obviously troubled by the question.

“She will take you,” he finally settled on. “And you don’t want that, right?” Gavin shook his head wildly because this lady was evil. He didn’t know how he could tell, he just knew that he could.

“Okay, good. So follow me for now and we’ll get inside.”

Gavin nodded but when he tried to get on his feet, Ryan took a tight grasp in his arm, “Gavin, you have to listen to me on this one. If I tell you to stop or to hide, you do it, and if I tell you to be quiet, you have to be really, really quiet.”

“So that the lady won’t find us?”

“Exactly. Can you do that?”

He nodded and Ryan seemed pleased with that.

They moved along in a strange pattern, not following the path at all. Ryan would gesticulate to him what they would do next, using very little words. He’d point to some trees, boulders or nearly collapsed parts of walls and then they would run there to hide once again.

Listening seemed to be a very important thing because Ryan did it a lot, and sometimes Gavin would also hear things. Hurried steps, rushing leaves, but those didn’t seem to concern Ryan, so it wasn’t the lady.

Where there other people here as well?

Gavin didn’t dare to ask, not when they were sneaking around like this, moving at a snail’s pace.

The first time he heard the strange caw again, it froze him on the spot. Ryan hissed at him to hide but he couldn’t. He just looked around wide eyes and waited for the lady to appear again.

Ryan tore at his arm until Gavin fell into the next bush. His head was pushed down, into the soft ground and he could smell dirt and grass as something whooshed past them.

The fog started soon after.

Ryan just walked through it, not concerned at all at the white clouds hanging right above the ground. It looked strange though, it sticked to their legs and pulled like spiderwebs when they moved and the first time they crouched somewhere, Gavin started to cough. He couldn’t help himself because the fog burned his throat and his eyes, making them water.

Ryan shushed him but all he could do was curl into himself, stifling his coughs against his fist.

“It’s alright,” Ryan whispered as he began to rub his back. It were the first words he had said in a while. “You’ll get used to it and you won’t have to cough anymore. It’s just like this at first.”

He could only hope that Ryan was right because he got the feeling that the fog was settling in his stomach like a thick soup, and he wanted to throw it all up.

Gagging, he calmed only slowly but they got lucky.

Ryan was keeping a hand on his back but when Gavin glanced up to him, he was attentive, constantly looking around. It took a few more minutes until he dared to take a big breath again.

It tasted stale and awful but it didn’t burn anymore. Wiping over his face, his sleeve came back dirty and he didn’t even care.

“Sorry,” he whined, but Ryan shook his head.

“It’s normal and it turned out alright. We’re nearly there now, can you see it?”

He pulled Gavin closer so that he could look around the boulder they were hiding behind and it took him a while to make out the big shadow. 

It was a building, a huge one that stood there in the fog and the little light they had.

“What’s that?” Gavin asked in awe as his eyes followed the huge dome at the top.

“It was a… hospital some time ago.”

A hospital? But the hospital was down the road in the next city. He had been there when his grandpa had been sick.

But before he could ask, Ryan already pointed ahead and they moved on. Here was more debris and they moved behind a wall for a while before they climbed through an opening that had maybe been a window some time ago.

Now up close, Gavin could see a big metal arch in front of the entry and he slowly read the letters aloud, “Crotus Prenn A- Asi-”

“Asylum,” Ryan helped along and that word sounded familiar. It took him a moment until Gavin remembered why.

“It’s the bad house where the bad people were kept!” he said. “My mom told me not to go there!”

“Your mom is a very smart woman then, but right now it’s the safest place to be.”

Unsure, Gavin watched him but then followed along. It wasn’t like he had too much of a choice.

The door of the place laid in the grass, the glass broken and Ryan warned him about shards as they took the few steps to get inside.

It was dirty there, dusty and dark and with a lot of trash everywhere. It also smelled bad, like something was rotting away in here but the fog stopped right at the threshold. Their steps echoed in the little entrance area as Ryan guided him towards the stairs.

“They don’t look safe,” Gavin mumbled as he carefully took the steps. Some of them were broken, dangerous to step a foot on them. He was pretty sure there was mold around the edge.

“They’ve held for a long time already.”

“Okay.” Turning his head, he tried to catch a glimpse out of the windows but they were high up and if there was still glass in them, it was dirty like it hadn’t been cleaned in forever.

“Was this really a hospital?” he asked as they turned into a long, long hallway. That looked more like a hospital, he remembered taking his mom’s hand as they walked through that maze. 

“It’s really, really old. An asylum is a place for people who are not quite alright. They are healthy and have nothing broken but there is something not working in their head.”

“You mean people who are crazy?” Gavin asked. “I once met a man who was talking to himself the whole time. It was a bit scary.”

“Something like that. Today you can help those people really well but back when this one here was built… they weren’t helped that much.”

“But if they were sick, they should have been helped. They will just get more sick otherwise,” Gavin protested and Ryan turned to him with a small smile.

“I agree with that and many other people have as well. So, long ago this place was closed and since then nobody took care of it.”

They turned a corner and Ryan took his arm. “Be careful here.”

A part of the wall was completely missing, shards and stones littering the ground, and Gavin was very careful to step over them as they sneaked closer to the gaping hole.

It was dizzying, to be so high up and have no safety whatsoever. He could walk right off if he wanted to or managed to stumble here. Still, from here he could see very far, over the debris and the trees now growing in between, down to a huge wall that seemed to go around the whole thing.

He frowned at the sight because hadn’t he just walked through there? He woke up by a campfire but he couldn’t see it from here. Was he so turned around?

Ryan seemed to notice his confusion and told him, “It closed after you went through. It always does.”

“Walls can’t do that.”

Ryan nodded thoughtfully, “Normally they don’t, you’re right. Everything is a bit… a bit different in here, Gavin.” Leaning a bit ahead, he still kept a tight hold on him as he pointed to the left. “Do you see that big gate down there? All the way in the back?”

Gavin slowly creeped closer to the edge until yes, there was something in the fog. He nodded. “Is that how I will get home?”

“That’s how we will all get home hopefully,” Ryan told him but he sounded strangely sad about it. “It’s closed for now though.”

“Then open it!”

“We’re trying.” Ryan moved away and pulled him along. Here there were a lot of doors and Ryan opened one of them into a small, small room.

There was one bed in the corner, a strangely red locker and that was it. No window, just blank floor but at least it was cleaner than the rest of this strange place.

“Be careful, there’s a hole. There are a lot of holes in this building, so always watch out.” Ryan pointed to the back corner and Gavin walked closer. The hole was maybe as big as his fist and from here he could actually look into the floor below.

“Do you live here?” he asked as Ryan lit one of the many candles that laid on the small table next to the bed. Only that it wasn’t a table, it was a cart that had been turned around to function as such.

“I try to survive here. Sally usually doesn’t come into rooms so it’s relatively safe here.”

“Sally?”

“The lady you saw before. Sally Smithson is her name, at least we believe it’s her. We found some records, you know?”

Gavin didn't really care as he stepped away from the hole and closer to the warm shine of the candle. “So when can I go home?”

“When we open the gate,” Ryan explained and sat on the bed. It creaked and still he patted the place next to him for Gavin to sit down. “And that’s the problem. We haven’t quite figured out how yet.”

“Can’t you just pull it open?”

Ryan chuckled at that. “I fear it’s not that easy, buddy. It works with electricity but the good news is, we found some generators. They needed some repairs, but now they’re working again. Since then we at least have a little light in here. It’s just… not enough yet.”

“Not enough?”

Ryan nodded. “But we’re looking around, searching for more and then we can get out of here! It just takes a time to look around because we can’t let Sally see us. Do you understand?”

“I think so.” Shuffling closer, he climbed onto the bed. “What is this place?”

“I can’t answer that. I also only woke up here, just like you.”

“But there are others here?”

“A couple more people. You… should probably keep away from them for now. Not all of them are… are good.”

“But you are?” Gavin asked hopefully and Ryan smiled sadly.

“I really hope so, buddy.”

 

* * *

 

Ryan tried hard not to panic. He had gotten used to that feeling since getting here of course, it was hard to keep yourself together knowing that you were hunted, knowing what would happen if you were caught.

Out here, he had seen a lot of things. Horrible, horrible things.

Before waking up here, he had seen dead people, yes. But never before had he seen someone die. Not even his grandpa when he had been a child. His grandpa had fallen asleep but that was far from what was happening here.

He had seen people die in horrible, horrible ways heard their screams when he tried to rest for a while. They echoed in this closed space when someone got caught or hurt, and that wasn’t the worst of it, God no.

Up here, from the broken windows he had watched people running at this disfigured nurse, had laughed when that bonesaw cut through their muscles and flesh.

Madness reigned in this space, reigned in each of them.

And now there was a child in here.

Gavin was sleeping on the bed, wrapped in the itchy blankets he had found at some point. They had been so dusty and moldy that Ryan hadn’t even wanted to know how old they were. But it was better than nothing in these cold nights.

He was sitting on the floor, leaning his back against the bed and clasped a hand tightly over his mouth so he wouldn’t wake the boy.

What should he do?

He couldn’t lock him in here because even in here it wasn’t safe. Nowhere was safe when Sally walked through the halls, popping up wherever and whenever she wanted to.

It wasn’t even a game of wits, he had seen many who had survived for so very long getting caught by surprise, as if this damn nurse had just been toying with them before.

It was impossible to foresee her next moves, to figure out which route was the safest right now.

It took a damn lot of luck and nobody here seemed to have enough.

On the other hand he had never saved a life before coming here, but now he had something like practice in it. It was hard but possible to help someone in the grasp of the nurse and even though he had often failed, there were a few times when he had succeeded. Even covered in blood, trying to patch up some nasty wounds, it was an indescribable feeling.

Did that mean he could save this boy? Had he learned enough to also keep someone else safe?

It was hard to tell, he got lucky more than once to get this far but the thing was, he didn’t really have a choice.

The moment he had pulled this crying child into the bushes, he had sealed his very own fate. He couldn’t just shove him from his room and tell him to watch over himself.

The boy would be dead within an hour and Ryan doubted anyone else would even care. There were not more than a handful of people who even dared and tried to help someone, most just took the chance to take a breath when Sally was occupied with someone else. 

When someone was caught it meant at least a short moment without fear of getting caught yourself.

At first Ryan had been angry about that, had screamed and tried to reason with those people but by now he understood.

Getting those gates open was more important. It was unlikely to save someone once the nurse got them in their grasp and endangering oneself wasn’t an easy decision to make.

It was all just a point of view.

Turning his head, he found the boy’s brow furrowed, little hands grasping the blanket.

Ten years old.

Good God, this was no place for adults, even less for a kid.

But here he was and now he’d have to deal with this.

How could he explain to the boy in how much danger they were? How could he stop him from seeing all this horror waiting here?

Right now, he had no answer for that.

 

Ryan startled awake like he did most of the time now. There was no real day and night circle, it always stayed dark so he just nodded off when he got too tired.

For a moment he was confused as to why he was on the floor and not in his bed but then he remembered.

The boy. Gavin.

Sitting up, he found the bed empty, the sheets tossed and the door slightly ajar.

“Fuck.”

Doors didn’t mean a lot out here, not when the nurse could just blink through them but it was at least something. Some form of protection.

Stumbling to his feet, he stopped himself from calling out. Not making a noise was one of the first rules to learn here, listening for anything unusual the second.

Why hadn’t he heard the boy? He should have!

Opening the door fully, he carefully looked up and down the long hallway. No sign of good old Sally, which was good, and he found Gavin.

Relaxing slightly, he stepped out of his room.

The boy stood by the collapsed wall, looking down into the field below. He had sat down on the littered ground, most likely to keep from slipping and falling out.

When he heard Ryan, he looked up.

In the pale moonlight he looked sick, eyes huge in fear and the cold wind tousling his hair.

“What are you doing out here?” Ryan mumbled and rubbed his face to get rid of the lingering tiredness. “It’s dangerous.”

“I was careful and really quiet,” Gavin told him and stood up. “I thought it was all a nightmare but you were there when I woke up.”

“So you went to check?”

The boy nodded. His face was tight and he was shaking a little. Ryan wasn’t sure if it was because it was cold or out of fear.

“I want to go home.”

“I know, bud. We’ll work on it, alright?”

The boy nodded and when Ryan held out his hand, he took it and stood.

“Can I help?” Gavin asked as he trotted after him.

It made him shiver just thinking about it. Gavin out there with him while they searched for more generators, for parts and maybe other survivors. The boy seeing the horrors out there. Never, he wouldn’t allow that. It was hard enough on his own mind, let alone a child! 

“No, it's better if you stay in my room.” 

“All alone?”

“It’s safe in there.” He opened the door and crossed the small space. Sitting Gavin on his bed, he made sure the boy was looking him in the eyes, “I won’t stay outside for too long and until then you have to stay here, okay? And I mean here, don’t go outside!”

“I wanna come with you!” Gavin protested but Ryan quickly shook his head.

“Absolutely not. It’s too dangerous out there.”

“Bu-”

“Promise me, Gavin. Promise me you won’t leave this room without my permission!”

The boy scooted a bit around, pouting before he nodded.

“Good boy,” Ryan praised him and ruffled his hair. “If you hear anything, anything at all, I want you to hide. In the closet or under the bed. Just out of sight, okay?”

“Will she come in here?” Gavin asked fearful, hands grasping the blanket tightly.

“It’s a possibility,” he admitted. “But I don’t think she will, okay? It’s just a safety measure.”

“Okay.”

 

Leaving the boy alone felt wrong but taking him with him would end even worse. It was just another worry on top of all the others as Ryan moved through the bushes towards the place he had found Gavin yesterday.

It was part of his daily ritual, to check this whole area in a controlled fashion. Finding another generator sounded so easy when he had said it to Gavin but it was dark and the mist thick, the fear keeping him from moving too fast.

And now he couldn’t help but throw even more glances over his shoulders, up to the windows of the asylum. Wondering if Gavin was alright, if the nurse was moving through the halls hunting the boy down.

But he couldn’t stand still, couldn’t just wait for others to fix the generators and stay behind with the boy. He had seen what happened to people doing that.

They went insane.

So all he could do was hurry up and get back as soon as possible.

From his pocket he pulled a little glass container. It was a clear reagent; he had found it in the office spaces along with some other things. 

When he crouched there and listened for long enough to make sure he was alone, he threw it to the ground. It shattered and cleared the mist surrounding them.

He didn’t understand how or why, he was just glad that it did.

It was a great help for searching things because nothing was more frustrating than missing a single damn screw to get a part running.

Moving silently, he began to search through the cleared out space.

It was frustrating work, tedious at best and most times he came home empty handed. One of the worst things was that he had no way to tell how much time had passed.

His watch had stopped working upon waking up here and the light never changed. It could feel like forever or like no time at all had passed.

This world was strange like that.

He stumbled over something in the high grass and bent down to pick it up. It was too bright for being here, the colors too vivid but it was definitely a backpack. Green with cartoonish cats on it and surprisingly heavy. As he opened it, he found books inside and sat down.

God, it had been long since he had found books that didn’t tell grisly stories about lobotomies or other horrible things. Those were all over the place here, along with disturbing diaries, but no, those were math books, english stories, a bunch of others.

It had to be Gavin’s school bag, he must have lost it while running because Ryan hadn’t seen it on him yesterday.

The more he pulled out, the more he found. Broken crayons and pencil nubs hidden inside, rolling around, but also blank paper and a pencil case.

That was good, he could give that to the boy. Gavin could draw, could write while Ryan was gone which was certainly better than just sitting around in the room. Giving him something to do would greatly reduce the risk of him wandering off!

Putting everything back inside, he closed the bag and threw it over his shoulder.

He should search further, he hadn’t even heard the nurse today and that was rare enough. But if old Sally wasn’t here, she was maybe in the asylum.

So he returned early and sure enough, the closer he got back to the building the more he could hear distant noises. It could be some other survivors stalking through the bushes but once or twice he could hear the nurse’s scream.

It was distant enough but she could be fast if she wanted to be.

Going through the entrance, he followed the stairs up like usually, only to freeze when he heard something behind him. Turning around, he saw someone else running inside.

They were too fast for him to call out, hurrying deeper into the asylum and Ryan decided it was also time for him to get away.

With quick steps he hurried past the collapsed wall and down the hallway until he stopped in front of his room-  _their_ room. Looking back and forth, he still found himself alone and stepped inside.

As he closed the door, he pressed his ear against it but couldn’t hear anyone outside. He stayed like this for a while, only slowly letting his eyes travel and realized that Gavin was gone.

His heart skipped a beat and he stepped into the room fully, whispered, “Shit, shit, shit!” 

He should have known!

The boy had grown bored and had decided to trail off, look around for a bit.

What if he got caught? What if he would hear his little screams next?

His hands tightened around the strap of the backpack as he turned around himself as if he hoped he would just materialize out of thin air. Instead the door of the locker next to him opened and he nearly jumped out of his skin.

“Ryan?” Gavin asked shyly as he sat amidst the dust and dirt. He seemed pale, scared and when he recognized Ryan, he darted out and flung himself at him. His arms wrapped around his middle as he buried his face in his belly and Ryan quickly reached down to pat his head.

“Oh, it’s fine. I’m here now.”

“There were scary noises,” Gavin whined and without much thought he picked the boy up. His little body was shivering, arms coming around his shoulder to grasp tightly.

He rocked the boy for a while and when he rubbed the other’s back, he could feel how tense he was. God, of course he had been scared. How long had he hid in that locker?

“You did good, you did so very good,” he whispered but the boy didn’t answer, just held on tighter.

They stood like this for a while until Gavin’s soft tremors faded but it was alright, the boy barely weighed anything to begin with. After a while, Ryan began to go up and down, shushing him slowly.

To be honest, he had no idea how to deal with children. Sure, he had occasionally babysit a nephew or a neighbour kid but that was about it. Certainly not a situation like this right now but at least Gavin seemed to be calming down.

When the boy lifted his head from his shoulder, his cheeks were red but he hadn’t cried, “Did you open the gate?”

“Not yet, sorry. But look what I found.”

He held up the bag and Gavin immediately made grabby hands for it. “My bag! Ryan, you found my bag!”

“I guess I did.” He let the boy down and had to immediately hand the bag over. Gavin also didn’t hesitate, just poured the whole content on the dirty ground. He did it with such a childish joy as if Ryan had brought him a great treasure.

Now Gavin was crouching down, touching each thing gently as if he was taking stock.

“Everything still there?” Ryan asked as he sat on the bed and Gavin nodded. He opened the pencil box, rummaging around until he was satisfied with the content before bringing his books to the bed.

Kneeling in front of it, he began to explain to Ryan for what lessons they were needed and at which chapter they currently were and Ryan listened attentively. 

It was nice hearing another voice for once. Sure, he had quick, shushed talks with other survivors but they weren’t as colorful as this one. So he asked his questions and let himself be swept away by the cheerful explanations and for the first time in a long, long while he felt better.

 

* * *

 

Gavin didn’t like the time when Ryan was away and he was stuck all alone in the room. It never was too long, always bearable, but one time Ryan sat him down and explained to him what to do should he not come back and that filled him with horror. What would he do out here without Ryan? 

He had cried and begged Ryan not to go and Ryan had quickly shushed him down, assured him that it wouldn’t happen. After all he had been here for so long, he wouldn’t disappear so shortly before the gate would open!

In the end Gavin believed him, kinda.

Still, he couldn’t help but fear for it every time he sat on the bed alone, waiting for Ryan to return. The fear grew dull at some point as he exhausted himself about it. Maybe he just grew used to it, and after a while alone he would grow bored.

There wasn’t a lot to do besides sit there and listen. Occasionally he would dart for the locker and hide there but after a few times he was able to distinguish between Ryan’s footsteps and other noises.

The strange woman, Sally, would sometimes move through the hallways. She had no footsteps which was strange but he didn’t like to think about it.

Still, her cries were loud and Gavin always hid the moment he heard them. When she was really close the noises were unbearable but most of all he could hear her breathing. Heavy gasps as if she didn’t get enough air into her lungs.

He closed his eyes then and pushed his hands against his ears.

But she never stepped into the room he was in and so he could crawl out when it grew quiet again.

With his books it was a bit better. He would sit on the bed and read. Ryan had some books as well, found around the asylum but he didn’t understand the big words inside, so he stayed with his own ones.

He even did his homework!

Well, not all of it, he still didn’t like politics, but he did his math homework.

When Ryan got home all tired and sweaty, he would sit down with him and check on it. A lot of times he got everything right but when he didn’t, Ryan helped him along.

He knew that the older was tired and most likely just wanted to sleep but he always stayed awake to take care of him. It was nice.

Ryan even explained him the next chapter and eagerly Gavin went along to do those exercises as well.

He couldn’t wait to get back and be smarter than all of the other kids in class!

He would be as smart as Ryan and Ryan knew a lot of things! He explained to him the generators, even took him to one that was in the basement of the asylum.

It was making loud noises which was a bit scary in the usual silence but it was bright down there. The lights weren’t dim or flickered like the ones upstairs and they stayed there for a while, making bunnies and dogs with their shadows.

On the way back Gavin found some screws and Ryan got really proud. They were rusty and dirty but it didn’t matter. 

Ryan had a whole box of them underneath the bed.

Sometimes Gavin went and counted them. He even kept a little list with the exact measurements and amount. Ryan said that was a great help and once they found a new generator, they would get it running in no time at all.

The mist was still here and Ryan didn’t even seem to notice. Gavin wasn’t quite sure how because sometimes it came from underneath the door and made him really, really tired. It would scratch in the back of his throat and his head would start to hurt. He didn’t cough anymore though, just like Ryan had said and that was good.

It was hard to be quiet when you had to cough.

And still, he didn’t like the feeling of breathing it in. It didn’t taste like anything but it was as if it made him heavy somehow. He didn’t feel like running around and do his homework. He didn’t want to talk to Ryan then and it hurt the other, he could see that.

All he wanted was to sleep.

He guessed that was what happened because he startled awake by the caw of the strange woman.

Sitting up, he blinked sluggishly. 

He was alone in the room, Ryan had gone out some time ago, and his book laid on the floor. He must have fallen asleep and now he could hear the breathing.

In that moment he froze. Blind panic reached for him because those noises were close, very close. Like she was right in front of the door.

She was, he realized. She was right outside this room and he stared at the door, imagined how the handle would turn slowly. Her terrifying shadow as she appeared in the crack of the door, just watching.

Watching him for a long, long moment before she would enter and tower over him. She would bring more of the fog with her before she would take him, just like Ryan always said.

Tears shot into his eyes and finally he could glance towards the locker.

He had to be very quiet, if she heard the old hinge-

The caw interrupted his thoughts and with it he realized his mistake. She didn’t have to turn the handle, she didn’t have to push the door open and Gavin rolled from the bed. The ground was hard and dirty but he squeezed beneath the bed, in between all the filth and the cobwebs as the lady appeared in the room.

He could see her by the door, his eyes wide and while still watching, he noticed his blanket. He must have pulled it halfway down as he had rolled off and now it was slowly slipping. It was a slow but steady movement but the only one in the room and then it pooled on the ground with a quiet  _ whoosh. _

Immediately the lady appeared in front of the bed, observing the movement and Gavin pushed his hands against his mouth and stopped breathing.

She wasn’t walking, no. Her feet didn’t reach the ground, they were bare and dirty and bloody but they weren’t touching the ground. Nothing of her was, the scrapes of what remained of her uniform was stained in filth and she really brought dark smoke with her, it billowed around her, crawling underneath the bed with him.

He stared at the feet even though his eyes started to water from the fog and oh God, she would pull him out from underneath the bed right now. She would reach with her thin, pale arms and tear at his hair until he was out.

She would be strong, she had to be if Ryan was scared of her and now she was so close, he could easily reach out and touch her. Not that he would, never.

Her strangled breathing was drilled into his brain, like she was so desperate to catch her breath as she floated around the blanket, looking at it from all sides.

It was horrifying and Gavin couldn’t move. His eyes couldn’t even seem to follow her movements as his body locked up, freezing him right where he was. He still wasn’t breathing, didn’t dare to even blink and he could feel tears running down his face, fearing they would somehow give away his position. He didn’t know how or why, if the white lady would be able to smell them or hear them fall.

It didn’t matter.

Then she turned around, facing the locker and pulled it open. It was a quick, startling movement that made Gavin flinch. Thankfully any noise he might have made was drowned out by the hinges and oh God, oh God-

Normally he would have hid in there. He had hid in there multiple times and she just- she ju-

Ryan had said it would be safe there!

That it would be safe here!

The white lady threw the doors close again and didn’t move, just breathed her horrible loud breaths.

Then she left.

With a loud, horrible scream she vanished from his sight. The dark fog traveling behind her dissipated slowly but he still didn’t dare to breathe. His eyes were locked on the place she had just been as tears dripped down his face.

He wanted his mommy. He wanted to get home or to wake up or hide beneath his own bed, not this one here were cobwebs were so thick and full of dust that he could feel them sticking in his hair and on his neck.

That wouldn’t happen and a part of him knew that. That part demanded Ryan, wanted Ryan to come back right  _ now  _ but he didn’t call. His voice was gone, he couldn’t even move and it was as if his body wasn’t his anymore.

Maybe Ryan could hear his heartbeat because it was slamming so violently that it hurt his ribs.

Carefully and as quiet as possible, he dared to take a breath. That hurt as well, his lungs screaming from the strain of not breathing for so long but he still kept his hands clasped over his mouth.

He stayed right there, didn’t dare to move in case she came back and that was how Ryan found him. Maybe he had recognized Ryan’s steps already before but it didn’t register in his mind. Only when the door opened, did he flinch like he was waking up a little.

Ryan called him quietly but he couldn’t unhinge his jaw, couldn’t make a noise because he was somewhere lost in his body.

So he watched as Ryan checked on the locker and wondered what would happen if Ryan didn’t find him. Would he die down here? Would Ryan think the white lady had taken him?

He couldn’t tell, just watched as Ryan grew frantic, opening the door again as if he wanted to dart out and search for him.

Gavin didn’t want him to leave, he wanted him to stay close because he was too scared to being alone here.

It didn’t leave his mouth, it were just lost thoughts in his otherwise empty head but Ryan hesitated in the door. The next thing Gavin knew was Ryan in front of him, his blue eyes going wide and Gavin let him pull him out.

Ryan was warm as they sat on the floor and now Gavin began to shake.

It started in his hands and then worked through his little body until even his teeth were chattering.

Ryan tried to shush him down, soft noises right in his ear but Gavin barely registered it. He sat in the other’s lap, slumped against his chest and tried to call him. He wanted to warn Ryan that he felt like falling, felt like he was still beneath the bed and couldn’t move but he couldn’t get the words out.

In the end Ryan’s arms locked around him, warm and strong as he was rocked, and slowly Gavin let his eyes drift shut.

Ryan was whispering calming words in his ear, saying that it was fine, that they were safe. All white lies but Gavin wanted to believe them.

Fingers combed through his hair, freeing him from those nasty cobwebs and then rubbing down his spine. At one point Ryan shifted and they sat down on the bed. The blanket was wrapped around him because Gavin was still shaking violently, eyes tightly closed and maybe he fell asleep or something close to it.

When he slowly resurfaced, he couldn’t tell how long he had been gone. He was lying in bed, the blanket still tightly wrapped around him to keep him warm.

Ryan was next to him, holding him close and that was good. Gavin’s back was against the wall and so Ryan shielded him from the door and the white lady. He didn’t want her to return, he never wanted to see her ever again!

Whimpering, he buried his face in Ryan’s chest.

The older was asleep but his arm dropped down to curl around him.

It was nice and it was good but not enough.

He wanted to go home.

 

* * *

 

Gavin’s silence was terrifying.

Ryan hadn’t even realized how used he had gotten to the babbling of the boy, but now that it was missing, it was unnerving. He figured the nurse had been in the room, that’s why the boy had hidden beneath the bed. It was no wonder that he was spooked but that wasn’t it.

Gavin seemed to be in some kind of shock.

His breath a bit too fast, the eyes a bit too wide and the shaking that just wouldn't ease. Even when the boy fell into an exhausted sleep it was still there in his clinging hands, and soft whimpers.

He didn’t talk, even after waking up. A strange heaviness surrounding him that just didn’t seem to pass. Ryan was glad when he got a reaction out of him, if it was a soft glance or even less, because Gavin had locked him out.

He was somewhere deep inside his own thoughts, where Ryan couldn't reach him.

So he stayed with him for now, let the boy curl into his side as he read him stories from his book.

They were childish little things that seemed grotesque in their situation but Gavin had his head tucked beneath his chin and listened intently. When they eventually ran out of stories, he told his own and it even made Gavin smile a little.

It fell just as quickly when Ryan moved to get up and the kid clung to him. He was only moving to check on the hallway, not to go out but the fear was so vivid in Gavin’s eyes, that he quickly laid back down with him.

This wasn’t a solution, he couldn’t stay like this. He tried to explain that to Gavin after another deep sleep of the boy, hoping he would feel better now but he just shook his head wildly. So he stayed for a few hours longer, laying in silence with the boy breathing against his shoulder and he nearly jumped when Gavin finally talked, “The white lady doesn’t touch the ground.”

Turning his head, he breathed in the shampoo of Gavin’s hair. Nauseatingly sweet like bubblegum and barely there anymore but somehow comforting.

“I know.”

“Is she a ghost?”

“Something like that. She was someone who worked here before.”

“Did she die?”

He thought about the rope around her neck, the crooked state of her head and nodded. “I think she did, Gav.”

The boy fell quiet, small hands grasping at Ryan’s dirty jacket as he whispered, “I wish she would have stayed dead.”  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have over 100 hours in this game and I still suck, it's amazing.
> 
> Nowhere Kids will update tomorrow and the final of this story will go online next week! Until then!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boy stepped ahead and wrapped his arms around Ryan’s middle.
> 
> “It’s true, right?” he asked. “We’ll look out for each other.”
> 
> “Absolutely, bud. We’ll get out of here together.”

Chapter 2

 

He took the boy out with him because Gavin refused to stay alone. Ryan knew that he shouldn’t allow him that, that outside there were horrors waiting but he was too scared to see Gavin run after him all alone.

The boy had cleaned out his bag and was wearing it now, collecting scraps of metal, screws and the occasional flowers he would find. Each time they ran for a short while, Ryan could hear the contents inside rumble around and it made him nervous.

“If we ever get in danger and we have to run, I want you to throw that bag away,” he told him and Gavin didn’t seem happy about it.

“But it’s my bag. Mom told me to take care of it because it was expensive.”

“We can grab it again later but you can’t make any noise if you try to hide, okay?”

Gavin nodded slowly.

Somehow he looked older now. He was dirty just like they all were and his body was littered with scratches from moving through the bushes. His legs looked the worst because he had nothing besides the shorts to protect them.

Ryan had looked around but hadn’t found anything remotely in Gavin’s size. Just old, moldy gowns from patients. Maybe he could sew something, but he had no needle.

Reaching out, he tried to wipe some dirt from Gavin’s cheek and wondered how long the boy was in here now. It was hard to tell, there was just this everlasting twilight, the moon high above.

Also it made him wonder how long he was already here but it was such a depressing thought that he quickly let it go again.

Gavin looked up at the touch and smiled. They were sitting behind a boulder where it was relatively safe, the fog hiding them.

“You think we can go on?” he asked and with a deep breath, Gavin nodded.

Ryan moved ahead but Gavin always stayed close enough that he could feel his body heat. Most of the time he would reach ahead and grasp his sleeve to not get lost but over time the boy grew a bit more daring.

The asylum was to their left in the distance. Like this all they could see was the flickering lights and the dome above the fog. It was an eerie sight but he always reminded Gavin where it was, that he should keep an eye out for it.

If they ever happened to get separated, they would meet up in their little room.

A scream rose in the silence, loud and panicked, and before Ryan could do much than turn his head in the direction, Gavin already pressed against his back.

They both stayed quiet, crouched down in some bushes and Ryan opened his mouth to tell him that it was okay, that it was some distance away when the scream got interrupted by a strange gurgle.

It sounded painful, wet of all things and Gavin whimpered. The boy fought to duck beneath Ryan’s arm and Ryan pulled him close.

“What is that? What is happening?” Gavin whispered frantically. “Ryan?”

The noise died down slowly and Ryan tried to shush the boy down. He knew the other was scared and he let him curl in his lap but right now he had to listen. Had to make sure the noise wasn’t closer than he might think it was.

He listened with his eyes closed for a while but all he could hear was his heartbeat and Gavin’s shallow breaths, the rustling of leaves in the wind. All the while he wondered what he should tell Gavin.

How could he tell a child what was happening?

He had seen it before, how this nurse, this creature would throw people on a hook. Would let them hang there as they screamed themselves hoarse. How violently she would bring those bone saw down on flesh.

Shivering, he wrapped his arms around Gavin and held him close.

“We should be fine,” he mumbled. “It wasn’t close by.”

“What happened?” Gavin asked again and then, in a fearful whisper, “Someone got hurt.”

“Sally… Sally found someone.”

Turning his head, Gavin stared up at him with huge eyes. Ryan was nearly sure he could see his own reflection in them.

“What will she do now?”

Oh no. No, he would not tell him that!

“I don’t know,” Ryan lied and when the boy began to shake, he quickly ruffled his hair. “Hey. Hey, it’s fine! She won’t get you, alright? I’ll make sure of it!”

Gavin nodded again and hid his face in Ryan’s chest. He could still feel him shaking and sat down. They would take their time right now, after all good ol’ Sally was occupied.

“What about you?” Gavin asked eventually. “She also won’t get you, right?”

He couldn’t help but smile as he nuzzled Gavin’s hair. The sweet scent of his shampoo was long gone, replaced with sweat and earth. “Of course not. We’ll watch out for each other.”

“Yeah…”

“Do you want to go back now?”

Gavin lifted his head again but didn’t look at him; instead he took in their surroundings before shaking his head. “It was far away right? We can search for a bit longer.”

That was true and it would be a waste to let this opportunity pass. Still… “You sure?”

Gavin nodded and squirmed to get up. He took Ryan’s hand and pulled to get him to stand as well. “Let’s search for a generator.”

“Okay boss,” Ryan chuckled and Gavin grinned up to him. The boy stepped ahead and wrapped his arms around Ryan’s middle.

“It’s true, right?” he asked. “We’ll look out for each other.”

“Absolutely, bud. We’ll get out of here together.”

 

They didn’t get that much further, searching through some of the ruins and by the little laughs, Ryan could tell that Gavin found something to put in his bag. Somehow the boy had better eyes than him because he could easily carry his five screws in his hand.

Still, he was the first who heard the shuffling steps but Gavin was only a second behind. They weren’t far apart but just as he had taught him, Gavin darted towards him.

It wasn’t the cawing or the heavy breathing the nurse did, so it had to be another survivor and as they surely weren’t as dangerous as the nurse, they could be unpredictable.

“Who’s there?” a voice called and he needed a moment to recognize it. It was Katia, another survivor he had talked to once or twice. A stoic person but far from being the worse.

He relaxed and stopped pushing Gavin behind him.

“It’s me,” he called and soon enough the woman stepped around a corner.

She was small, which according to her had saved her ass a few times already. Her hair had been blond before but the color was growing out with time.

“Ryan,” she began but trailed off when her eyes fell on Gavin. “What is a kid doing here?”

Ryan could feel Gavin press against him, trying to hide somehow and he quickly laid a hand on his head. “The same thing we are. Trying to get out.”

She stared at Gavin a little longer before frowning, “Okay but what are you doing with him? He’ll be dead in a week.”

“He won’t,” Ryan said harshly because he could feel Gavin’s haunted glance towards him.

“You know Sally, she doesn’t care if they are sick or hurt. She won’t give a fuck if he’s a kid or not, she will ju-”

“He’s been with me for way longer than a week,” Ryan interrupted her quickly, because he really didn’t need that picture painted out for Gavin. “He’s smart and he’ll be just fine! So do you have anything useful to say or not?”

She threw another dismissive look before shaking her head and letting the topic drop. “Some guy found another generator all the way in the corner. Fucking overgrown with all kinds of shit but he freed most of it. Now we just need some parts for it.”

Those were amazing news! Another generator might just be all they needed to finally get out. He was just about to open his mouth, but Gavin was faster, “We have all kinds of screws.”

He spoke very quietly and slowly, making sure to pronounce every words just right. Like he wanted to impress her.

“I have some with me right now.” He reached for his bag but Ryan stopped him.

“In the corner you said?”

“Yeah, nearly all the way south.” She nodded in the direction but her eyes stayed on Gavin. Like this, Ryan couldn’t tell what she was thinking.

“We’ll be there soon,” he continued. “First we get the whole box we collected, right, Gav?”

The boy nodded, still pressed against his side and right now Ryan only wanted to get her to leave. He wasn’t quite sure why but he didn't want other people knowing about Gavin. The people here were twisted and cruel and God knew what strange ideas they might have.

True, he hadn’t had any problems with Katia before, but until now it had always been only him and not also a child who was depending on him.

“Fine,” she said and finally her eyes traveled to him. “Just make sure to let anyone know.”

“Of course.” He took a tight hold on Gavin and pulled him along, back towards the asylum. The boy sometimes threw glances over his shoulder but Ryan knew that Katia was gone, had heard her leave in the opposite direction.

They moved on in silence but he could tell that Gavin was worrying over something and that was no surprise. Ryan just decided not to mention the elephant in the room.

Stepping into the asylum, they hurried up the stairs and only when they stepped into their little room, did Gavin speak, “It’s strange.”

“What is?”

“To see other people,” he mumbled. “I nearly believed that we were the only ones in this world.”

What an ominous thing to say. Ryan didn’t even know what he was supposed to say to that and instead kneeled down to pull the box from underneath the bed.

“Ryan?” Gavin went on as he sat up again, dusting the box off.

“Was that lady right? Will I die?”

He spun around and Gavin still stood by the door, playing with his sleeves. He had a look of intense concentration on his face and Ryan quickly reached out to him. “Of course not.”

Gavin hesitated before taking the hand and Ryan pulled him closer. They watched each other for a moment before he reached up to flick the boy beneath the chin. “We’ll be out very soon.”

“Okay.”

“You wanna put your new screws in the box now?”

The boy nodded and just like that his gloominess was gone. Ryan wasn’t sure if it would always be this easy.

 

Gavin proudly carried the box in his bag as Ryan lead them south. Or what they assume was south, someone had painted a makeshift compass into the upper floor of the asylum and they used it for orientation.

There were still no new sounds coming from the nurse, so Ryan was pretty relaxed and even ignored the rattling coming from Gavin’s bag at each step. They found the southern wall and followed along, he even allowed Gavin to run a bit ahead, skipping over stones and crawling through the empty windows.

It was a good feeling to walk around normally for once and Gavin seemed genuinely happy.

Only when they heard the distant noises of other people, did the boy hurry back to his side.

When they arrived, there were three people sitting around the generator and they all looked up in distrust. It was a normal reaction but when they noticed Gavin, a tense silence fell over all of them.

They outright stared at the boy and Ryan quickly reached down to put a hand on his shoulder. If he wanted to keep the boy from running off or just wanted to show those guys that he was under his protection, he wasn’t sure.

Then one of them, a young woman with scarred over scratches in her face, stood up and approached them carefully. “Hey there, sweetie,” she said softly as she crouched in front of Gavin. “How are you?”

“I’m fine,” the boy mumbled shyly and tried very hard not to outright stare at the scars. “I brought screws.”

“Really now?”

Nodding, Gavin opened his bag and held the box out. The woman reached for it but he quickly pressed it against his chest with a glance up to Ryan.

“It’s fine,” he told him. “We all want to get out of here.”

He tentatively handed it over but it took a while longer until he had enough courage to actually step closer and watch them work.

Ryan kept an eye on him as he kept noting down which screw the guys took, so that his list stayed accurate. Normally Ryan would also help along but the woman had sat down next to him, “Is he really okay?”

“I think so,” he said quietly. “He’s very brave.”

“God, he’s just a child.”

Ryan nodded thoughtfully and for a moment he dared to relax. It felt good, sharing this weight for once. “I’m really scared that something will happen to him.”

“Kids can be unpredictable,” she agreed. “Does he… know?”

“Most of it, but I didn’t tell him everything. He knows how to hide and move around quietly.”  Something a kid shouldn’t know, but somehow that thought made him smile, even if it was bitter, “He’s a good kid.”

She threw him a look before chuckling, “He seems like he is.”

They sat for a moment in silence, watching as Gavin worked on his list and occasionally handed the guys working some parts.

He seemed to enjoy himself and so Ryan let him but the woman next to him also grew nervous and after a while, he began to stand up.

Their time was nearly up, the nurse would be done with the poor fellow she had caught and Ryan wanted to be back before that happened.

If she got stronger or faster from the victims, he didn’t know, but he didn’t want to risk anything.

“Come on, Gav,” he said and held out his hand. “The screws can stay here but we have to get back now.”

The boy darted towards him and Ryan was proud how good he was following his commands. Even though he hoped it would never come to this but it might just save his life one day.

They were on the stairs when they heard the screaming of the nurse again and they stopped by the collapsed wall to look out over the field below. They couldn't see her, couldn’t see the generator but for now it was enough just to be up here.

“Ryan, how long does it take for a generator to get repaired?”

“Hard to say. It really depends on how damaged it is. The last one took really long but the more people know about it, the more people will work on it.”

“And that means we will repair it faster?”  
“Exactly.” He noticed Gavin’s grin and smiled back. “What do you wanna do then after we took a nap? Go and search some screws or check out the generator again?”

“The generator,” came it promptly. “We can search for screws on the way there.”

“Deal.” He was ready to go on but Gavin was crouching down to watch the field some more and instinctively his hand moved to his shoulder. It made him nervous that the kid was so close to the edge even though he was usually careful.

“This means we’ll be home soon, right?” Gavin asked thoughtfully and Ryan nodded.

“It certainly means we made a big step ahead. We can hope that it’s the last generator we need.”

The white fog appeared again and he could tell how Gavin hunched in on himself as if he was trying to hide. Ryan didn’t quite understand his fear of the fog, it could be great to hide in but he tugged at his shoulder to get them to move towards their room.

He just didn’t expect Gavin to catch up and take his hand, pulling until he stopped moving.

“What happens after we get out?” the boy asked and there was such a strange expression on his face, that he just couldn’t read.

“What do you mean? We’ll go back to our lives.”

“But what about you? Will you just be gone?”

Ah, that’s what it was about. To be honest he had to yet dare to dream about the outside world. It always seemed so distant, like a dream even though it should be a memory.

It was one of the reasons why he never asked from where Gavin was, which year he was from.

He feared the answer, feared that they would be worlds apart. Years apart. He had no clue how long he was in here already, how long that was in the real world.

It felt like forever.

Crouching down, he got on eye level with the boy. “Tell you what, when we get out I’ll find you, alright? It’s way easier for a grownup to find someone then the other way around.”

“I bet Mum would help me.”

“Oh, I’m sure she will. Let’s see who will be quicker than, alright?”

“Yeah!” Gavin nodded enthusiastically before letting him go and marching towards their room. “We better start making plans now because it can’t be that much longer, right?”

“I really hope so, bud.”

 

VIsiting the generator was becoming some kind of thing because Gavin loved watching the other survivors work on it. He would ask a thousand questions and if he was allowed to, he would help along by handing them screws.

Ryan wasn’t all too happy about it because the boy was too young to see it but he could clearly tell that not everyone was alright with the kid being there. He had heard them whisper that it was a bad sign.

It was stupid but he had seen people in here lash out over less.

They met the woman once more and she introduced herself as Abby. She had somehow managed to sew something that resembled pants out of some bedsheets but it was certainly better than nothing.

She had a daughter, one year older than Gavin, she told Ryan as they sat down next to the generator. It was a sad thought but she watched Gavin with a certain greed that made Ryan uneasy.

He knew that Gavin liked her a great deal because she would listen to everything he told her and maybe he was just jealous.

Still, Ryan was always happy when she wasn't anywhere in sight when they visited the generator.

He was hoping on the same thing today, as they headed down the wall. Today there was nothing rumbling in Gavin’s bag and the boy was a bit bummed out about it.

They had searched some new places today but they had already been picked clean and Ryan knew that Gavin loved to present his findings to the people working on the generator.

They should have more than enough for it by now, he could already hear the soft rattling coming from it but the thing had been so overgrown, that they still tried to rip plants from inside.

Now they could see the couple of survivor sitting around the generator and this time Gavin didn’t run ahead to present them his prize.

In retrospect, they got lucky.

Ryan could already see the glares the boy received just for being there and some were probably aimed at himself for bringing Gavin along. He didn’t really care as long as neither of them did something.

One of the men actually opened his mouth but before he could say a thing, they all heard the familiar caw. Turning around, Ryan stared towards the asylum. He could see the white figure for a second before she blinked again and this time her scream was deafening.

The nurse appeared next to the generator and swung her bonesaw.

Next to him, Gavin had frozen and they both watched blood splatter over the ground, horribly red in the saturated night. A gurgle sound followed soon as one of the man collapsed, holding his throat and for the longest time that seemed to be the only noise in the world.

In reality it couldn’t have been more than a heartbeat because the nurse gave an exhausted moan and seemed to slump into herself.

Then all hell broke lose.

There were breathless screams, people scrambling onto their legs and before Ryan could even think about it, his arm shot out and clamped around Gavin’s shoulder. He nearly ripped the boy from his two feet he pulled so hard, but it seemed to work and Gavin stumbled and turned around.

They ran.

Ryan wasn’t sure where to or had any plan behind this. He didn’t even know if they were chased to begin with and had no time to turn around and check.

But she was there.

She had just appeared there like a ghost and now she was after one of them for sure and all he could do was hope that it wasn’t them.

They reached some of the ruins and Ryan vaulted through one of the windows, hoping against hope that it would somehow make them lose her. A soft gasp made him hesitate and he turned around to see Gavin struggling to get through. He wasn’t tall enough to just jump, so he had to swing one leg over first.

Ryan grasped the back of his shirt like one would take a kitten by the scruff and pulled him through right as the nurse appeared on the other side of the window.

Stumbling away, he pressed Gavin against his chest as the bonesaw came down on them. He could feel it cut the air in front of his face before it embedded into the wooden sill.

Now they were face to face, with just a brittle wall in between them and Ryan was pretty sure his heart stopped in that moment. Beneath the dirty bag she had pulled over her crooked head, he could see her eyes glowing red.

Of all the things he had witnessed in here, that was probably the most terrifying.

Gavin made a noise that sounded strangely like a hiccup and that, along with feeling the boy shake against his chest, allowed him to move. He turned away from those terrifying eyes before they could pin him down any longer.

He wasn’t alone, he had to remind himself of that. He wasn’t alone and he had to look after Gavin because no one else would.

He hurried deeper into the ruins or at least the little of what was left. Turning corners and crouching into tall grass to catch his breath. He could still hear her, her long, hoarse breathing, and each second he expected her to just appear somewhere.

She was still looking for them, she was intelligent, knew that they were somewhere in there, and once or twice Ryan heard some locker doors being opened.

Gavin didn’t move or speak. He was barely more than a weight he had to carry around but that was probably for the best. Ryan wasn’t sure what he would do if the boy would cry and scream.

They’d probably be dead then.

The nurse appeared in the distance, near a tree they were heading to. Ryan fell on his ass in his hurry to stop moving and pressing Gavin close, he scrambled back behind a wall.

Pushing his back against the brittle wall, he waited. Where should they go? She would surely stay around!

He threw a look down towards Gavin but could only see the top of his head. The boy was hiding his face in his chest, grasping his shirt tightly.

Licking his lips, Ryan sent a short prayer to whoever would listen and slowly stood up again. He couldn’t hear the labored breaths anymore but also didn’t quite dare to check around the corner. A childish fear born from too many horror movies told him she would just wait there to jump at him.

Instead he moved back the way he had come from, making sure he still had a tight hold on Gavin’s small form.

There was a scream somewhere behind them but Ryan didn’t turn around, only Gavin lifted his head slightly. Hopefully it was one of the other survivors, hopefully she had found someone else and was hunting them.

Those were horrible thoughts and later he would deny ever thinking them but right now it was true. God, it was so true.

He found one of the lockers and reached out to open it quietly. His hand shook so hard that he nearly missed the handle to do so but in the end he managed and squeezed inside. Closing the door, he leaned against the wall and closed his eyes.

He wasn’t sure why, maybe to listen but to be honest right now he could just hear his own frantic heart. There were slits to look out from but he didn’t dare. He didn’t want to see it coming if she found them.

Then Gavin began to struggle and he pulled himself together.

“Can you stand?” he whispered and the boy nodded so he let him down. It was cramped in here and two adults wouldn’t be able to fit but like this they managed. It was so dark here, the only light source coming from the small slits, that he could barely see Gavin.

“Is she gone?” the boy asked and Ryan was a bit surprised. He had expected the boy to fall silent, like the last time he had been close to her.

“I hope so,” he found himself answering and his voice was a mess. Tight and shaking and he pressed his fist against his eyes.

He had to pull himself together. If not for him, then for Gavin.

Taking a deep breath, he could feel the boy shake because it had been a rather loud sound. “But I need you to listen, Gavin. We both have to listen really closely.”

“Okay.” He fell silent and Ryan could feel him shifting around as if he was trying to look outside as well even though he was nowhere near tall enough.

Taking another deep breath, Ryan opened his eyes again and looked out himself. There wasn’t much to see, the dark fog that would hopefully hide any trail they had left behind, some brittle wall to their left and there… what was that on the ground?

Not rubble or books, but something that looked like a hatch.

He had heard about that before, a hatch that appeared and disappeared on a whim but by now he had thought it to be nothing but a rumor. On the other hand he wasn’t surprised by anything anymore.

He was just debating if he should go out and check it out when Gavin sobbed. The boy tried to be very quiet, Ryan could see how he pushed his hands against his mouth but it shook through his whole body.

“Hey,” he mumbled and had a hard time crouching down in the tight space. “Hey, buddy. What’s wrong?”

What a stupid question. If he could he would kick himself for it.

“There w-was blood,” Gavin mumbled. It was hard to understand because he was still muffling his voice. “I think that guy i-is dead.”

Most likely, yeah. The nurse had gotten him so fast and with one clean strike, that Ryan was pretty sure he was dead or at least badly wounded.

Reaching out, he felt for Gavin’s head in the little light they had and ruffled his hair. “We don’t know that,” he told him. “And we are okay, right? You are not hurt?”

The boy shook his head but shyly stepped ahead. Ryan was quick to wrap him in his arms and sat down so that he could settle in his lap. It was narrow and uncomfortable but he didn’t care, just held Gavin as tight as he could because he feared the boy would shake apart beneath him.

“We’ll stay here for now, okay?” he mumbled into Gavin’s hair that didn’t smell like bubblegum shampoo anymore. “We stay here and wait until we’re sure she is far, far away and then we head back.”

“But the generator!”

“Someone will take care of that soon enough but for now it’s too dangerous.”

“I wanna go home,” Gavin mumbled. “I want us to go home and then… then you can come over and I’ll show you my room, okay? I have a lot of books and I play football! Can we play football together?”

“I’d love to.” Closing his eyes, he nearly allowed himself to imagine this but he quickly pushed it back down. Hope could be dangerous but God, he wanted it to be true. “Soon, okay? Very soon.”

 

They stayed in the locker for a long time. Ryan was more or less dozing, while Gavin was full out sleeping. The boy had cried a little but had tried to hide it, so Ryan hadn’t said a thing. Now he was curled against his chest, exhausted but calm, and he didn’t want to disturb him.

He briefly thought about the hatch outside, if he should check it out or not but again he didn’t dare to hope.

The black fog came from the cracks in the doors and somehow Gavin woke up from it. They both listened with closed eyes until Ryan let them out.

The hatch was gone.

For a while he stared at the place where it had been but Gavin was pulling at his sleeve and so he let it go.

Just another mystery. He had enough of those for his entire life.

They began their walk back, hand in hand and Gavin still had his bag. Still there was nothing rumbling inside of it and Ryan was glad for it.

He hadn’t thought about that thing at all. It could have meant their death.

“Ryan?”

He looked down to the boy who looked tired and pale and older than before. Vulnerable. It grew better when he smiled nearly shyly, “I like you! You’re very nice!”

Suddenly Ryan had to swallow down tears. His eyes were swimming and he had to stop walking because… because this wasn’t fair.

This boy was too gentle, too damn young for this! He didn’t belong in this place!

“Ry-”

“I like you too,” he managed to bring out and then decided to fuck it. He picked him up and pressed a kiss to his dirty hair. “I like you as well, bud.”

And Gavin hugged him with all his little strength and just for a moment everything was alright.

 

* * *

 

Ryan asked him to stay in the room the next time he went for the generator and at first Gavin protested. True, the last time had been horrible and dangerous but at least Ryan had been with him! That was better, being alone was horrible and he got scared way easily.

Out there, when the nurse had been so close it had been easier because Ryan had held him very tight and he could just close his eyes and knew that he was safe.

But Ryan insisted and promised he would just take a look and come right back.

Now that Gavin sat on the old, moldy bed, he figured he understood why.

This guy had been hit while working on the generator. There had been blood, he could clearly remember that because it had been so bright and he had never before seen so much in one place. At least not real blood, just in movies.

So what if that guy was dead? Actually really dead like old people sometimes died?

The body would still be there then and Gavin really, really didn’t want to see it.

Maybe Ryan wanted to make sure it was okay to go there! Gavin didn’t want to have any more nightmares than he already had. He was always a bit scared that he would scream when he woke up or wet the bed.

Ryan wouldn’t laugh at him, he was pretty sure of that but it would still be awkward. He wasn’t a baby anymore!

So now he was scribbling down his math homework like Ryan had asked him to do. It was strange, the exercises were really hard even though he knew how to solve them. It was just that he couldn’t seem to think.

Sometimes he felt like the fog had wrapped around his brain and squeezed. When that happen he would be in a bad mood and very sleepy. One time he had stared at Ryan when he came back and couldn’t remember his name for several minutes.

He didn’t think Ryan noticed that but he surely noticed the mood swings.

Right now he felt his eyelids grow heavy once again but he fought through it. Ryan had asked him to finish those exercises so he would! It was dangerous to take a nap while being alone anyway, he had learned that.

So he went back to his exercises but mostly just scribbled in the corner of the paper. It were scary things, the nurse and the man who had all of the blood come out of him. He even went through his bag to find a red pencil and colored it. As he thought about it, he also made big red circles in the nurse’s face because her eyes were glowing.

That was strange, wasn’t it? Glowing eyes?

His cat’s eyes sometimes glowed in the dark but not red. Had he ever told Ryan that he had a cat? Probably, but he had never asked Ryan if he had a pet.

He would do it later.

Putting the pen down, he looked back inside his math book because he had already forgotten what he was meant to do. When he looked back down, he shivered at what he had drawn and quickly took his pen to cross it all out.

He must have nudged the red pen because it fell from the bed and rolled over the floor. Gavin watched it because it was certainly more entertaining than math for now but jumped up when he noticed that it was rolling towards the hole in the corner.

Ryan always told him to stay away from it, in fear he would step in and twist his ankle so Gavin hesitated a moment too long.

The pen went over the edge and he could hear it fall on the floor beneath.

Shit.

He was creeping closer, just so he could look over the edge and yeah, down there laid his red pencil.

He was debating if he should head down there and gather it before Ryan returned. After all it wasn't that far, he would be back in two minutes but before he could decide, he heard the telltale caw.

It made him freeze because it sounded kinda close and sure enough the nurse appeared down below. He could see the top of her head as she floated around the pen. She seemed very intrigued by it and Gavin hoped it wouldn't stay like that. Hopefully she would get bored and go away soon.

Instead she finally held still and slowly, very slowly lifted her head.

Gavin felt cold fear coil in his stomach as those red, red eyes stared right up to him. Through the hole he wasn't even suppose to step close to, the nurse stared at him and his feet wouldn't move.

She did move though. With one more caw, she disappeared from his sight. She wasn't gone, oh no, she had vanished towards the stairs up to him and slowly Gavin pushed his hands against his mouth.

Why? He wasn't quite sure. So that she wouldn't hear him anymore, maybe. But she had already seen him - _he had to run!_

His eyes traveled over the small room, searching for help or a weapon. There was nothing there. His bag laid next to the bed, the pens and books inside useless and Ryan was gone.

Ryan had gone to check on the generator so that they could get away from here.

Finally, he managed to take a step. It felt strange, like his feet weren't quite ready for that yet but he had to _move!_ Reaching the door, he pulled it open even though a small voice told him to hide underneath the bed again.

But she would find him there, she knew in which room he was! He had to get away!

The nurse stood in the hallway. He saw her as he stepped out and froze again.

She was a bit away, right by the stairs and even before the collapsed wall. He could hear her as well. Her heavy breathing beneath the bag but no steps because her feet didn't reach the floor.

If he was honest, he wetted himself right then and there but he didn't even notice. He stared at her as she stood there in the dim light, the old uniform dirty and torn and her eyes glowing.

She was turning a bit away from him but he wasn't sure if she saw him or not. She had to hear him because his heart was beating so fast that it hurt his chest and he wanted to throw up. Licking his lips, he clung to the door and debated if he should go back inside and try to hide when her head snapped around.

Now she saw him, her eyes seemed to brighten and the hand with her bonesaw rose.

Gavin threw himself around and ran.

Away from the stairs and deeper into the belly of the asylum. He had never been here before, Ryan had told him that he would get lost but right now it was his only option. And maybe he could get the nurse to get lost in the labyrinth of corridors.

He jumped over some books when he heard her caw. Gavin just skipped around a corner to change directions and she actually passed by him, he could feel a cold breeze against his neck.

He didn't stop to check where she had gone, he knew she was still on to him. With drumming feet and gasping breaths he ran on and suddenly he realized that he could die here. He was going to die in this dirty hallway with no one by his side. The guy by the generator at least hadn't seen it coming but Gavin could clearly remember that scarlet blood.

Was his blood like that as well?

Would Ryan find him here or would he just figure out what had happened to him?

No! He didn't want to die! Ryan had said they would go home together and that very soon!

Another caw and this time he couldn't find another hallway. But there were dozen of doors, so he just threw himself against one and hoped for the best. The door actually sprang open and he stumbled into the room before his foot got stuck on something and he smacked to the ground hard enough that he lost all his breath.

A cloud of dust and mold made him cough but he fought to get to his knees.

The floor beneath was made out of dirty green tiles and as he looked around he found a lot of medical equipment. It hung from the ceiling and in the dim light the metal frames looked like skeletons.

It made his breath hitch and he tried to get up. His foot had hit a bed that had been pushed onto its side and he used it for help to get on his feet. His knees were shaking because inside of here it was nearly pitch black. Still, he pushed himself to go in deeper, towards the opposite wall to find another door.

The room was a lot larger than he had though, maybe an ER of some kind but it was hard to say with only seeing the first few feet.

With outstretched arms he moved ahead and tried to hold his breath.

He couldn't hear the nurse anymore but that didn't have to mean a lot, right? She didn't walk like he did, she could probably see in the dark and wasn't afraid.

He felt frozen inside, like in a dream even though he knew it wasn't one. This was real!

His hand hit something cold and he flinched away before realizing it was a shelf of some sort. He had reached the opposite side and now searched with his hand. Another shelf to the left but after that was nothing and then- a door!

He pulled it open and found another hallway to follow. This one was better lit because there were some of those broken windows on one wall. It also brought in icy wind and the door behind him fell shut with a bang that sounded deafening in the asylum.

Swearing, Gavin began to run again because the nurse would surely follow the sound. He wanted her to be gone! She had no right to be here!

Behind him he heard the caw, a little further away but still way too close. It made him cry and he sobbed drily. It wasn't fair! He had done nothing wrong!

Wiping his eyes, he saw that the hallway was widening and large chunks of the floor were missing. He could see down a floor below and for a moment he wondered if he should jump down.

But down there was rubbish and debris and what if he would break his legs? Then he couldn't run anymore.

So he avoided the holes and even jumped over one and in the next moment it grew bright. Throwing a look up, he was now exactly beneath the glass dome. The broken roof let the moonlight through and the round room he was in, was washed in silver light.

Before, when this building had been in its prime, he was sure it was the heart of the whole thing. He bet it had been beautiful!

Right now it filled him with fear because he was in the spotlight as the nurse appeared at the end of the long hallway he had just come from.

She was coughing, gasping as if the teleporting was costing her strength.

Still, it was impossible for her not to see him and Gavin bursted in the next room and bumped right into someone's back. The person yelled in surprise but he just clung to the clothes, panting out, "Ryan!"

They turned around and it wasn't Ryan. Of course it wasn't, Ryan was out by the generator and had told him not to go here. It was a woman, who was pale in shock of being disturbed so suddenly and he guessed he didn't look any better.

"God, you scared me!" she brought out. "What are yo-"

"Hide!" Gavin gasped and that had to be enough of an explanation. It should be clear what he was running from.

Looking around, his heart sunk.

The room was tiny, an office probably.

The woman stood in front of a desk, notebooks all over it and shelves on the walls.

No other door.

The only way out was back and Gavin sobbed again.

He felt hopeless and scared and very, very small. The woman shoved him to the side and he stumbled against one of the shelves. Slowly, like he was on autopilot he squeezed in between the wall and the shelf. There wasn't much space but the only other place was beneath the table and he saw how the woman ducked beneath there.

He would get found, he knew that as he cowered there.

The nurse would pull him out of here and his blood would be all over the floor.

Ryan wouldn't find him here, he was too deep inside this asylum.

He wouldn't see his mom again or his family or his cat.

He wouldn't go back to class and show how far ahead he was in math now.

He started to cry again. It were those big tears that were hot enough that it felt like it would scald his skin. This time he allowed them to run down his cheeks as long as he muffled himself with his arm. It didn't matter, right? She couldn't smell him, at least he was pretty sure but she could definitely hear him.

So if there was a chance... as small as it was-

With a loud scream, the nurse appeared in front of the desk and Gavin closed his eyes. He didn't want to see her, her red eyes and her bare feet that didn't touch the floor. His hands would be so cold and boney when he would drag him out by his arm or his hair. Just with one hand though, because with the other she would strike the bonesaw down.

It would hurt and he didn't want it to hurt.

He was scared, he really was! Nobody would come for him; it would be impossible for anyone to find him here. Not his parents and not Ryan.

Her breathing bored into his head, loud and labored and he knew this sound would haunt him for the rest of his life.

A dull thud echoed through the room and he flinched, waiting for a cold grip or a sharp edge. When it didn't happen, he cracked one eye open and saw that the nurse had moved around the table and had struck the wood, straight through one of the notebooks.

The woman wasn't hiding beneath anymore, she was crouching at the front now, careful to move whenever the nurse moved to stay out of sight. Now she was glancing at him and Gavin wondered what he saw.

His face felt dirty and sticky from tears and snot but he held her gaze. It was strange, while he did that it felt like time was slowing down. There were a lot of emotions running through the woman's face but they were too complicated, he didn't recognize them all.

She seemed sad but also smiled a little, like she wanted to calm him down.

That seemed stupid, to smile in a situation like this and he couldn't bring his lips to return it.

Then she darted away, throwing open the door and ran out of the hallway. It was so sudden, that Gavin didn't even know how to react.

Should he follow her?

But then the nurse already screamed and vanished, going after that poor woman, and he was left alone.

Alone in his small corner, with pissed pants and a snotty face as he shook apart.

Why had she done that? The nurse hadn't even seen her! Maybe she would have vanished herself!

Sniffing, Gavin let it go because his head was too full right now. He just stared at his knees for a while. He just simply existed for a while.

Only when he heard a grunt of pain in the distance, did he look up.

Should he move or stay hidden? The nurse was still around, he knew that, could hear her occasional caws, so he should probably stay here. He was tired enough to fall asleep, exhausted to the bone but he forced himself to stay awake.

It was true, he should search for a slightly better hiding place and wait there but that wasn't what he wanted.

He wanted Ryan.

Rubbing his eyes, he squeezed himself out of his little hole and got on his shaking legs.

As he stepped out of the office, it was quiet. He stopped where he was and tilted his head to look up at the huge dome. The moon shone through the cracks, a full moon that sent all his silver light to him and again he wanted to stand right here when the asylum was in its prime. Or right in the beginning, when it would smell like fresh paint.

When he closed his eyes, he could nearly pretend to be there.

He shook himself and pushed his feet on. He needed to find their room again. Maybe Ryan wasn't back yet because if he was already searching for him, it would be hard to find him. But they were suppose to meet back in the room when they got separated, right?

So he would just hide underneath the blanket until he returned.

Following the long hallway back, he wasn't quite sure how to get back to their room. In his headless flight he had quite paid attention to the way but he would find it somehow, right? Of course he would.

He just didn't anticipate how huge this building was as he walked his way, figuring it was the right one even when he came past rooms he had never seen before. He didn't have the energy to worry about it anymore, he didn't have the energy to hide when the screams would come close. All he did was drag his feet on.

He came across a pool of blood, fresh and red. Footprints running to the right and he figured they were made by the woman.

Stepping over it, he continued in the opposite direction.

When he saw the staircase, he stopped. Never before had he seen it from this side but he turned until he could see the caved in wall ahead. As he reached it, he watched the outside, the bright fog coming from nowhere as if the world was on fire.

Closing his eyes, he swayed right there at the edge and tried to tell himself to move on. The room was just a bit further, he just had to go there and crawl into bed but he was so tired.

He started to cry again, as if he had ever really stopped and then he crouched down. It was better than standing and nearly falling, at least he was pretty sure as he folded his arms on his knees to muffle his sobs in them.

He felt so empty, carved out even though he was so full. Full of fear and loneliness and he just wanted to go _home!_

Why was this happening?

"Oh God," someone said and then steps were closing in. "Oh, there you are."

Gavin was snatched up and he instinctively wrapped his arms around Ryan's shoulders.

"Thank God. Thank God, I didn't know where you were," he babbled on while they were moving.

"Ryan..." Gavin whined and buried his face in the other's neck.

"It's okay, it's fine, bud. We just... just have to leave now, okay?" The weren't heading towards their room but down the stairs and Gavin frowned. He wanted to sleep.

"Just keep your eyes closed, okay? Real tightly until I tell you not to. Promise?"

He nodded and held on tighter. Maybe he could fall asleep right here, even though Ryan was running and it was shaking him but he was so tired, it didn't even matter. The cold air outside woke him a bit but he didn't move a bit.

The screams followed them but it wasn't only those of the nurse. But he could tell it was her breathing, that horrible, horrible noise.

Whining, he kept his eyes tightly closed just like Ryan had told him and now Ryan was shushing him down while running and Gavin tried to be as quiet as possible.

They weren't in the asylum anymore, Ryan's steps didn't echo anymore but he could hear them darting through bushes. The breathing was still there but it was hard to tell from where it came. It seemed to be all around.

Ryan was scared, he could tell. His heart was beating so violently that Gavin could feel it against his chest, could hear his breath against his ear that was hitching ever so slightly.

But he didn't let him go, even though he was slowing him down and Gavin knew that if Ryan decided it was too much and would put him down, he would end up dead.

It was just a passing thought, he trusted Ryan enough to not fear that happening.

They darted around a corner and Ryan fell on his knees. He let Gavin go to catch himself but he was clinging to the other like a monkey and didn't fall off. One of Ryan's arms was back quickly, pushing him against his chest as they crawled and cowered.

Gavin still didn't dare to open his eyes because Ryan hadn't allowed him to, so he just trusted that they were hidden somewhere.

Ryan was gasping for breath and it was ruffling his hair. Then he swallowed heavily and hugged him close.

"Let me go now," he whispered and Gavin frowned before shaking his head.

"I'll stay, I swear to God, Gavin," Ryan quickly told him. "But I want you to cover your ears with your hands now. I want you to not hear a thing. Can you do that?"

He could. Unwrapping himself from Ryan, he reached up to his ears and pushed down. The sound of his own blood rushed through his ears like when he was listening to the sea in a shell.

He could still feel Ryan, could feel how Ryan covered his eyes with his own calloused hand.

They sat like that and Gavin felt lost to the world, not able to see or to hear and he was just happy that Ryan was warm and right beside him.

Still, he heard the high pitched death rattle echoing around, making him flinch.

Ryan pulled him close but he was also shaking and Gavin was crying into his shoulder. The screams didn't stop even if he barely heard them through his hands. They were strange noises, noises that didn't belong to a human but he figured it still was. It was the woman, right?

The woman he had run into the office.

He pushed his hands against his ears until it hurt and slowly the noises died down. Ryan had still a hand over his eyes but he was moving it now, to tug at Gavin's arms.

"We need to move," he whispered and Gavin felt it more than hear it. Still, he let his hands fall to his side and stood when Ryan pulled him up. He kept his eyes close and just took Ryan's hand as they walked.

Out there, he could still hear something but he didn't know the noise and he didn't want to.

"I'm going to tell you a story," Ryan said and Gavin nodded wildly. He wanted to hear a different story, maybe about princesses and dragons and brave knights.

But it wasn't a fairytale.

"I talked to some people about the other day. When we ran away I saw a hatch."

"A hatch?" Gavin asked and his voice sounded ruined. Ryan squeezed his hand.

"Yeah, it's another way out. Or at least they say it is. One guy was searching for it and they never saw him again."

"Maybe the nurse got him?"

"That could be but you know what? It's magical, okay? It's a magical hatch." He stopped and Gavin ran into his back. "Open your eyes, please? It's safe right now."

He trusted Ryan and so he opened his eyes. He had to blink against the sudden light after keeping them closed for so long but Ryan was kneeling in front of him.

"Ryan?"

"It's fine," he assured him but Ryan looked like he was going to cry. Stepping ahead, Gavin wrapped him in his arms to cheer him up and Ryan held him close, his breath ruffling his hair. There was the hatch behind him in the ground. The lid looked heavy.

"You're going to be alright, buddy. You're going to be just fine." Ryan dropped a kiss on top of his hair and then let him go. He moved to the hatch and began to pull on it. It moved with a loud, mechanical screech.

"She's still close," Gavin told him but didn't dare to turn around. His eyes were locked on Ryan.

"I know but we have to act. The hatch changes places."

"It's a way out?"

Ryan nodded and Gavin stepped closer right as he managed to swing the lid open. Beneath was just darkness and Gavin couldn't help but shake.

It looked like a nightmare and not the exit out of one.

Ryan took his arm and he looked up to him, wanted to ask him to keep real close, to not let him go in there alone but he could already tell that it would be useless.

"You said together," he protested but Ryan just cupped his face.

"I'll search for you," he said and ignored how Gavin shook his head. The hatch would close after him, he knew that deep inside. Ryan wouldn't follow him.

"I promise, Gavin. You just go home to your mom, okay? Tell her I said hi and then you can go back to school and show them how smart you are."

"My books are still in the room."

Ryan snorted and leaned his forehead against Gavin's. He had his eyes closed but Gavin couldn't close his, had to watch him.

The cawing of the nurse was close by, moving in on the loud noise of the hatch.

"Live, Gavin," Ryan whispered. "Live for both of us, okay?"

He opened his mouth but the nurse appeared behind Ryan and he could just gasp.

Ryan pushed him away, it was rough as he dragged him towards the hatch. Rougher than Ryan had ever touched him but his eyes were on the coughing nurse.

At least until he stepped into nothing and quickly clung to Ryan's arm. "No!"

Ryan shushed him down but Gavin fought against his grip. It didn't change a thing, the other so much stronger as he pushed him inside the darkness.

"Ryan! No, Ryan!" he managed to bring out but then he was falling. Falling into the blackness and he could hear the metallic screech as the hatch closed and the cawing as the nurse attack.

Then he was gone.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Epilogue follows tomorrow!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “He looked after me."

Epilogue

 

Gavin woke up staring up at trees. He was laying on his back in the dirt and he hadn’t escaped, he was still here, he-

Then he realized he could see stars. There were stars above instead of just a moon.

Turning his head, he couldn’t see the huge dome of the asylum.

Realizing that, he started to cry. It were big, hot tears than ran down his cheeks but they were quiet as he fought to get on his legs.

Walking through the forest wasn’t as scary. He didn’t fear the darkness anymore and as he walked into a random direction, light fell in from above after a while. It was the dawn, he realized and it had been so long since he had seen daylight.

It seemed wonderful and soon enough it was warm, cutting through the trees to fall on his skin. He looked horribly pale, he realized but he didn’t care.

When he reached the edge of the forest, he found a street and stared at it for a while.

The fact that it was there, that there was dew on the tarmac was such a strange concept to him, that he didn’t know how to react.

A part of him wanted to step closer and touch it to make sure it was real but before he could get his legs to move, someone was calling him.

There was a car now that hadn’t been there before. A man was standing in the open door and on the backseat were two young children staring.

The man asked him something and it took Gavin a while to find his voice. It took so long that the stranger had asked him a couple more times and when Gavin asked him where Ryan was, somehow the other got confused and thought his name was Ryan.

He didn’t have the strength to correct him, he just sat down right where he was and held his head in his hands.

The kids got out of the car, he could hear how they were asking the man questions but the man was phoning. He saw their shoes move in the corner of his eye until he closed them.

Maybe he had dozed off because the next he knew was that he was surrounded by other people. A nice woman explained him that they were doctors and would get him to the hospital.

Her voice was a nice up and down and he liked to listen to it. They drove in an ambulance and he held her hand until she had to go away. 

He cried a bit over that but she told him that he was brave and that made him feel a bit better.

Later, when he laid in a bed after eating some soup, he could tell them his real name and then he asked after Ryan.

Ryan had surely come out by now, right? They got the generator running and got out.

Yeah.

He fell asleep and when he woke up his mom was crying. He also started crying and they hugged and she kissed his face and his bruised hands. Then he fell back asleep.

 

They asked a lot of questions and it made his head hurt. He told them over and over again but they didn’t believe him.

Stress, shock, a defense mechanism, they said. A fantasy to cope with what happened or something like that.

So when Gavin figured he wouldn’t get anywhere with that, he began to ask for Ryan. Each time someone came in, he asked for Ryan.

“He looked after me,” he told his mom who always sat by his side. “He protected me and he got me out. He said we would get back together but… but the hatch closed, I think. He couldn’t follow me but he will also flee soon, right?”

“I’m sure of it,” she told him and then she went to some police officer who was tall and talked in a really deep voice that intimidate Gavin. But his mom yelled at him, angry and loud, telling him to find this man.

Later, he didn’t know if a week or days, his mom sat down and took his hand. She was holding a photo in her hand.

“Baby, that’s the only Ryan around here that’s missing right now.”

It wasn’t his Ryan. The Ryan on the photo was a really old man, without any hair and Gavin pushed the photo away.

“Do you know his last name, Gavvy?”

He didn’t.

He had never asked and so he hid beneath his blanket to cry.

 

It took a while until another man visited him. His mom was with him and explained to him that he would have to talk with this mister now. Every week because he would help him to remember things correctly.

Gavin was pretty sure that he was remembering everything correctly but then his mom brought in a christmas tree. It was a small one to stand on his bedside table in the hospital and he stared at it with wide eyes.

He had been missing for eight months and knew that it couldn’t be true.

 

Sometimes he nearly believed that Mister Hodges was right. Mister Hodges was his psychiatrist and Gavin had to visit him each week even after he got home from the hospital. The visits often left him very tired and exhausted.

Mister Hodges said he had imagined everything because it was easier to pretend that it was a monster keeping them in that old building, than an actual human.

That it seemed that this nurse was teleporting because it had been more than one person but his brain had stopped distinguishing between them.

To protect him, Mister Hodges said. That was normal, Mister Hodges said.

Gavin nearly believed him until Mister Hodges said that maybe that was the case for Ryan as well. A guardian angel, a friend, he had imagined when he needed one.

Someone to talk to, who would protect him.

Just the thought of that enraged Gavin so much, that he screamed in the little room. Screamed and kicked his feet and threw things from the table.

The room was soundproof or something like that but somehow his mom still heard him and rushed in.

She brought him home and sat him down and shushed him. It took long and then she told him that it was just a theory, that it didn’t have to be right.

It didn’t help because the thought that he was waiting for no one… that Ryan didn’t exist terrified him.

He began to have nightmares, worse than before. Where he was alone in the forest and the asylum and there was no Ryan.

Where the nurse, good ol’ Sally, was hunting him through dark corridors.

He woke screaming while thrashing around. He began to wet his bed again which he hadn’t done since he had been four years old.

On some days he sat in his bed and just watched through the window. On this days he didn’t want to talk, didn’t want to eat but sometimes he did anyway because it would make his mom smile and he loved her very much.

She believed him.

 

He didn’t go to school anymore.

Large crowds made him nervous because he saw her in the corner of his eyes. Saw her standing between friends he had before, knew that she was standing behind him.

If there was no Ryan, there was no one who would protect him.

Also the kids looked at him all strange. They whispered and some laughed.

He didn’t like them.

His mom taught him and she told him he was smart. Ryan had done the same and Gavin still remembered some of his exercises.

Wasn’t that proof enough?

Maybe his kidnappers had left his books behind, Mister Hodges said. Maybe he had taught himself.

 

He was sitting on the couch, staring at the TV. Some show was running but sometimes it was hard to concentrate for him, so he stared at the bright colors on the screen and thought nothing.

The door rang, he guessed. At least his mom went by him to answer it.

She had just collected laundry and had the wooden basket pressed to her hip to open the door.

It could be Miss Holly, who was their neighbour. Or a reporter.

They had swarmed them in the first year but now they had stopped.

That was better, they were talking so loud and fast that it made Gavin’s head spin.

“I’m sorry for disturbing you, Ma’am.”

The voice cut through Gavin’s existing over here on the couch and he turned his head. Like this he couldn’t look outside because his mom was blocking the view. She always only opened the door a bit because sometimes people had tried to barge right in to see him.

Those had been scary.

“How can I help you?” his mom asked but even though it was a polite question, she said it with a sharp voice.

“My name is James Haywood,” the voice said and Gavin got to his feet to walk closer. “But most people call me Ryan.”

“So? What doe-” his mom began but then stopped. The door opened a bit further because she let go of the handle. The basket with the laundry fell from her other hand and now Gavin could see Ryan.

He looked different now. Clean and shaved and without scratches. It made him look younger even when he looked too thin, too tired, too haunted.

He was holding Gavin’s bag up. His old school bag that was dirty and ripped apart but certainly his.

His mom tried to say something, Gavin could see how her mouth opened but nothing came out. 

It was Gavin who called, “Ryan!”

Blue eyes darted past his mother, found him and then Ryan opened his mouth as well. He also got nothing out because his knees bucked. 

His mom tried to steady him but by then Ryan was already on his knees, tears in his eyes and Gavin darted towards him.

“You got out,” Ryan sobbed as Gavin threw himself in his arms. “You got out, you got out, oh God. I prayed each second. I-  _ God… ” _

His voice broke and Gavin was pulled tightly. It hurt and he couldn’t breath right but he clung to Ryan like his life depended on it.

“She isn’t here,” Gavin told him. “The white lady isn’t here, Ryan.”

“I know. God, I know.”

“We’re awake! We woke up! The nightmare is gone!”

 

The End

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And there's that!  
> So yeah, that was meant to be a short scene and then I said it would be 10k max and then I actually left out a whole chapter and look where we are now.  
> Nearly 20k on this small side project, welp.
> 
> Anyway, there was actually another chapter coming that sticks closer to the actual lore.  
> For those who are not familiar with Dead by Daylight: in the game, even if you escape through the hatch or the gate, you are still trapped and will just jump into the next match.  
> This goes on until you are so desperate and lose all hope so you turn into a killer yourself.  
> Fun!  
> So feel free to imagine that!
> 
> Thank you guys so much for reading!


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